The Year in Review

Wow, it’s been a cRaZy year, huh?  I can’t believe 2011 is coming to a close.  I think back to what I went through this year and it seems so surreal.  Good gravy.  I think of all the pain in my bones, the fatigue, the pain from radiation, the emotional struggles of finding out some friends could turn their backs on me, the upsetting knowledge that my employer would terminate me in the middle of my treatment…all of that and I have to say it’s totally overshadowed by the fact that I am blessed!  I have the best family, friends, and supporters in the world!

During the first part of my treatment I read many blogs written by women in my position and many of them said that getting breast cancer was a blessing.  I thought “clearly these women have lost their God loving minds.”  Breast cancer; a blessing?  This was right around when Bin Laden was captured and killed.  I had wished our government had brought him back here for a few rounds of Red Devil first before shooting him and burying him at sea.  Chemotherapy is definitely a punishment.  Of course, it’s also a good thing because without it I couldn’t have kicked the snot out of breast cancer. 

But I have to say, I see it now…what these ladies were saying.  Yes, of course I would have liked to have avoided the whole dreadful disease but since I had to go through it, I’ve learned a lot and I guess I can say it was a blessing.  I have never felt such an outpouring of support, love and prayers.  From my family and friends in New York, Florida, Pennsylvania and California to the IT department at my old job; I have truly been blessed.

I know I’ve said it before but Facebook has been wonderful for me.  I have reconnected with so many friends from my past.  I never would have connected with them had it not been for Facebook.  My biggest supporters: Arlene in Texas; Suzanne in Florida; Chris R., Maggie, Janice, Chris Y, Ann and Gemma in New York, Mary Jo in Kansas all became my “friend” on Facebook when I needed them the most.

I do believe, God willing, the worst of it is behind me.  I thank God for seeing me through this.  I will say I’m not an overly religious person, but I do believe in God and I know, he too was there for me. 

I am so hoping you all have a wonderful holiday season and I wish you all the very best in 2012.  Life is good. It really is.

God Bless….Eva

Don't Mess with my Mojo...

Aw...first of all, I know it's been a while.  I've been working on a year end blog but it's still kind of only in my head.  I'm putting it aside to write what's in my head right now that's not a part of that blog.

First of all, here's an update:  (Just informing...remember)

I've been a little under the weather with some kind of cold or something.  Dr Toma's office put me on antibiotics that I think are doing the job.  Last weekend I sounded pretty bad...like my brother Ed on steroids.  I also felt like crap.  I guess my immune system is still not where it needs to be.  

I'm also doing physical therapy for my arms and chest.  My right arm still hurts quite a bit when I raise it.  Christa Newgent, the physical therapist I mentioned a few blogs back who talked at the Breast Cancers Survivor's luncheon in October about lymphedema suggested when I went in for a consult on my lymphedema sleeve that I do PT.  Of course I had to take time off so I could sneeze and hack up a lung in the privacy of my own home. (I'm pretty okay with keeping my germs to myself)

The neuropathy still sucks but the Neurotin to treat it is just as bad.  By mid morning every day I'm ready for a three hour nap. If I have PT to go to I just try to hold off on taking my morning dose but sometimes, depending on the scheduling, I have no choice.  So, sorry to say it...I'm sleepy quite a bit. 

I'm trying to get into the Christmas spirit.  I did manage to get all our WNY gifts bought, wrapped, boxed and out in the mail.  Also we sent out a bunch of Christmas cards and we hand wrote most of the messages...adding more this year than last since so many more people have come back into my life.  So that's good. 

This leads me to the main topic of this blog...2012.  I really really am hoping, praying and needing a great new year.  Seriously after 2011 I need some good stuff in my life. (Not that there wasn't any good stuff in 2011...believe me there was...wait until the next blog for more on that.) I want to basically ignore any negative stuff.  It's full steam ahead on the Positivity Bus!  But...and we knew we'd have a but...I already see negativity on the horizon.  Aw...please!  I want to be selfish...I really don't want to deal with anything I can't control and I really don't want to feel bad about it.  That's pretty much the bottom line.  Sorry to be so cryptic but I really can't say more about it yet.   So is that so bad?  Aw...here's a struggle all in itself.  Stay tuned.